Dear Woosy,
My boyfriend very kindly made me breakfast this morning. I thought he was being extra nice to me because he and his mates got really drunk last night and had a big party in our lounge which kept me awake most of the night. The toast tasted really strange, but I didn’t want to be rude as my boyfriend hardly ever makes me breakfast. After I had eaten it, all his friends came into the kitchen and asked me one by one if I enjoyed my breakfast? They were all laughing when they asked me. Eventually, one of them asked me if I had enjoyed my spunk toast. Please tell me that it is not what I think it is?
Woosy says – I hate to tell you this, but it is exactly what you think it is. Have you ever heard of a “circle jerk”? A group of guys all stand in a circle around a piece of toast and ejaculate. The last guy to ejaculate would have to eat the toast. It looks like you were the “last guy” on this occasion.
I guess there will be no more drunken evenings going on at your house anymore.