Today we held a meeting, discussing cases linked to a barcode location that has not existed since 2007. Manager asked, “What do you suggest, Jim?”
Today we held a meeting, discussing cases linked to a barcode location that has not existed since 2007. Manager asked, “What do you suggest, Jim?”JA – “I’ve examined 10% of the cases, and I found no references in the comp records suggesting any association with us, nor that we ever possessed them, their whereabouts, or any indication of NFA.”
M – “That’s correct.”
JA – “They are linked to a location that stopped existing in 2007 and cannot be searched for physically.”
M – “True.”
JA – “We have no knowledge of their location, and searching for them isn’t an option?”
M – “Yes.”
JA – “In my limited understanding of English, that appears to classify them as lost.”
M – “Indeed.”
JA – “I recommend declaring them lost after checking with layby and archive.”
M – “We can’t do that; they’re not lost; they must be located somewhere, we need to find them.”
JA – “Your interpretation of lost differs from mine, as well as from most English speakers; being lost indicates it’s here but inaccessible to us.”
M – “Simply not knowing their location doesn’t mean they’re lost.”
JA – “I’m afraid that’s precisely how it does mean; would you like me to fetch my pocket dictionary?”
M – “I require you to arrange a search.”
JA – “Perhaps I could create wanted posters?”
M – “Please, be serious.”
JA – “You cannot fathom the effort this entails for me.”
M – “I am instructing you to organize a search?”
JA – “As you wish, my illogical Magnificence, Mountains high and Oceans deep.”
M – “Haven’t you anything constructive to contribute?”
It was at the moment I picked up my pen, waved it like a wand, and declared “lost cases revealo” that the meeting was abruptly ended (I still believe it was worth a try, as it worked at Hogwarts!).
by Jim Aborwhear
