It appears that a military defence force is being established in Western Australia.
The government has concluded that there is a need for special defence associated with valuable minerals in northern WA. Naturally, this will incur costs for taxpayers, including expenses for water pipelines, improved roads, and rail connections.
It is crucial for the military to access entertainment hubs in Fremantle and Busselton. A new Defence Tax will be necessary to fund the WA Precious Minerals Defence Force. The navy has already reached out to the Italian navy with plans to procure one hundred of their finest pedaloes, which are deemed more environmentally friendly than traditional battleships as they do not rely on petrol.
Reports suggest that a small group of twelve top minds is assembled in Canberra, sourced from leading universities, to strategize the most effective taxes to extract funds from everyday Australians.
Rodney and Peregrin devised the defence tax, while Godfrey and Eugene are focused on implementing a new sweets tax. They argue that by raising prices for smokers, the number of smokers decreases. Similarly, by substantially increasing the price of sweets, they anticipate generating significant revenue while potentially driving dentists out of business by 2050, with a Mars bar costing $2 potentially having a $20 tax added.
However, the most recent tax initiative has been proposed by Gilbert and Bernard.
They assert that there will be no tax on inhaling, as oxygen is an eco-friendly gas; however, expelling breath is releasing a toxic gas into the atmosphere, which will be taxed. This new initiative is termed the Pollution Tax.
Moreover, the government has mentioned that they may consider neutering scientists in order to enhance their focus and potentially improve their cognitive abilities.
A resident from East Sidney suggested introducing dog knotting. The minister acknowledged that it had been discussed but subsequently dismissed. Nonetheless, a committee will be formed to revisit this decision on a quarterly basis.
The prime minister announced that the implementation of a tax on late-night patrons and revelers who remain out after seven-thirty on weekdays in Fremantle and Busselton, aimed at catering to the Defence of Precious Minerals personnel, will be executed and doubled for those who possess both a car and a dog.
The man from East Sidney suggested that everyone should be dog knotted. During discussions between the PM and the minister, who is required to visit as many foreign nations as possible within a year, it was affirmed that the tax would be enforced. The overseas minister remarked that he did not own a dog.
It’s reassuring to note that WA is now safeguarded against potential threats from unfriendly nations. Since our closest neighboring country is Antarctica, which is undoubtedly hostile, we can all rest peacefully at night.
I can’t help but ponder what the East Sidney resident thinks about Canberra’s brightest minds.
by TOG