Tuesday, September 29, 2020
Home Agony Angel Lily Wright Dear Lily – I have nothing to look forward to

Dear Lily – I have nothing to look forward to

Dear Lily,

Now Christmas is over I have that familiar, encroaching feeling of doom as I realise I have absolutely nothing to look forward to in the near future except the arrival of hefty credit card bills and the daunting prospect of working off the megatonne of party food unwisely consumed over the Christmas period. Not only that, but I’ll end up making things worse by getting hideously drunk on cheap Cava at some anti-climatic New Years’ party and wake up on January 1 in the arms of some random hairy-backed gentleman of whom I have no recollection of ever meeting before. Can you suggest anything that might prevent me from sticking my head in the oven?

Lily says – This time of year is particularly miserable for many people: the presents are unwrapped and the contents highly disappointing; all the Quality Street with the exception of the orange creams have been scoffed; and the tinsel wilts listlessly on the dying tree as your stinking grandmother flatulates her way through the Doctor Who Christmas special. All that is left for you to do is waste the last remnants of the school holidays writing pointless and insincere thank-you letters to fat women called Jean who pretend to be your auntie, and begin the annual search for your swimming kit, which you eagerly tossed to one side at the end of last term still dripping and smelly and which is no doubt cultivating mushrooms somewhere at the bottom of your wardrobe. But don’t let this defeat you. You need to hang on to the fact that it won’t be long until you can crack open your new Powerpuff girls pencil case and dazzle your little school friends with your rainbow of shiny new felt tips and matching rubber that smells of strawberries. If you’re lucky, the others will be so consumed with jealousy at your Christmas haul that the feelings of depression and regret will soon fade away.
Hope that helps!

Most Popular

6 Jobs That Will Keep You in Shape

Matthew Talboys/Shutterstock.com 6 Jobs That Will Keep You in Shape Sedentary jobs are okay for those who don’t mind deskwork. The number of Americans who work...

7 Expert Tips for Staying in Shape While Working from Home

Undrey/Shutterstock.com 7 Expert Tips for Staying in Shape While Working from Home Today, the new normal includes millions of Americans working from home. Gyms across the...

The Best Sex Blogs & Adult Lifestyle Bloggers in Australia

1. Clitical View blog stats:

On this day…in 1883

The most powerful volcanic eruption in recorded history occurs on Krakatau (also called Krakatoa), a small, uninhabited volcanic island located west of Sumatra in...

Recent Comments

James Wooley Jr on On this day…in 1927
anvil on She’s hot
Stavin on She’s hot
Ed on She’s hot
bub on She’s hot
pepper on She’s Hot
Buried In Sand on She’s Hot
9iron on She’s Hot
Pushpraj on She’s hot
Ted on She’s hot
Juan pena on She’s hot
Some sheerio on Ed Sheeran is quite shit
Ed on She’s hot
(Same guy who tipped you off on Gemma Atkinson) on She’s hot
Greg Hopewell on She’s hot
westernwilson on Dear Mum and Dad…
TJ on She’s hot
Mary Whitehouse on She’s hot
Mary Whitehouse on Tommy Taylor’s SRU
Mond Behane on She’s hot
mani on She’s hot
Mond Behane on She’s hot
bob on She’s hot
kokjodkj on She’s hot
John S. on She’s hot
piep sny on Can YOU see the sea?
Davina on Whose fault is it?
Herman D. Schlonger on She’s hot
Buford Balony on Who’s the mug now, Spurs?
Barney911 on She’s hot
mehsssss on She’s hot
Buford Balony on The Champions League
سکس on She’s hot
Screw the English and other foreigners on Please keep Australia, Australian
Screw the English and other foreigners on Poms who get bored with Australia can fuck off
GeronimoX on The Pink Borat-ther
Danny Thunderpants on It doesn’t take long…does it…
Albert of manly on Will Hopoate is a cow of a man
Buford Balony on Feel sexy to get chatted up
Buford Balony on Feel sexy to get chatted up
australian shepherds on Probably the best dog in the world…
Herman D. Schlonger on The Kissing Debate – wet or long?
Herman D. Schlonger on How to REALLY satisfy your boyfriend
Buford Balony on Is Megan Fox too skinny?
Buford Balony on Buford comes home
hotsonic on Buford comes home
Danny Thunderpants on Pound aren’t your usual shit
Danny Thunderpants on Pound aren’t your usual shit
Australian Coalition Against Death Penalty (ACADP) on Ronald Ryan, the last execution in Australia
Dick Swan on Fish love a penis
crystal on Fish love a penis
Rood on Animal smokers
Vandas Voice on Davo’s quote of the day
Cam on A wee whisky
Buford Balony on Buford says…AFL sucks
Buford Balony on Buford says…AFL sucks
Buford Balony on Buford says…AFL sucks
Vandas Voice on Buford says…AFL sucks
Vandas Voice on Buford says…AFL sucks
Vandas Voice on Oz smashes the Pohms