Dear Woosy,
Due to the demands of my job, I often have to work away from home, leaving my wife to spend her evenings and weekends alone, which fills me with immense guilt. Fortunately, she has developed a friendship with our neighbor, Ted. This kind gentleman graciously allows my wife to prepare dinner for him in the evenings and enjoys her company over a glass of wine. He has even been generous enough to share our marital bed at night, as she claims it helps alleviate her terrible nightmares. I believed everything was going smoothly until I returned home to find Ted’s car in the driveway, and my key wouldn’t unlock the door. Peeking through the window, I noticed Ted’s slippers by the fire, and he seems to have a significant presence in several family portraits on the wall. While I assume there’s an innocent explanation for all this, I remain puzzled as they won’t answer the door. Could you provide any guidance?
Woosy says – Sometimes, placing too much trust in someone can backfire. You remind me of Mrs. Jolly, a substitute teacher I once had. She was quite rotund, often donned a poncho, and sported eccentric glasses. A rare type of educator, she once had unwavering faith in humanity, or at least she did at one point. For some inexplicable reason, she chose to communicate with us using a hand puppet duck named Huggles, and embraced an unconventional teaching style. Rather than adhering to the standard curriculum, she had us engaging in absurd activities, like singing the calypso rendition of the Lord’s Prayer while she strummed her guitar and swayed back and forth. Instead of focusing on math, we were required to perform an interpretive dance centered on the rainforest, and instead of discussing the Water Cycle, she let Huggles recite a poem about multiculturalism. Unfortunately, Mrs. Jolly made the poor decision to leave us alone with Huggles for ten minutes while she went to fetch a coffee. I doubt she was overly concerned about the poster paint in her handbag, but Huggles’ demise deeply affected her, and we all felt a twinge of guilt after the headmistress had to intervene. The lesson here is to avoid being overly trusting, especially towards those who don’t have your best interests at heart. Regrettably, it may be too late for you and Huggles, but perhaps you’ll take this to heart next time.
